Maintaining + building resilience
Are you ready for the holiday festivities?
I know the months of November and December can be difficult and sad for many partly due to being stretched in many different directions and because the holidays often remind us of loved ones who may be resting in peace or no longer with us. As some of you might have heard, my family and I had to say goodbye to a dear family member on December 3 rd , 2022, which was unexpected and difficult. In the past, a tragic loss like this made the holiday festivities hard for me to embrace because my nervous system wasn’t well equipped to cope with the emotions and experience. However, the last two years have provided me endless opportunities to practice a wide range of therapies, and I have taken full advantage of learning and utilizing as many of them as possible.
Some of my favorites include:
1 - Somatic experiencing (aka somatic healing): a therapy technique that engages the body and its physical sensations, utilizing functions of the nervous system.
2 - Nature therapy (including biophilia + forest bathing): interacting with or spending time in natural environments like forests, oceans, gardens & more for their therapeutic effects on the body and mind.
3 - Neuroplasticity: the brain’s ability to make adaptive changes, including forming new neurons, networks and pathways, related to the structure and function of the nervous system.
Having these in my tool box has allowed me to more compassionately and quickly move all the way through my emotions and enabled me to fully embrace the holiday festivities throughout November and December, despite experiencing painful losses in this season.
In other words, these tools have strengthened my resilience — the ability of my nervous system to come quickly back to a safe, restorative baseline (parasympathetic rest and digest) so I can embrace more of life and be present for more meaningful moments. This is what I hope for you too, which is why I am going to teach you one simple neuroplasticity technique that I have named Intentional Divergence (need to trademark this):
Close your eyes and think of a negative thought or story line physically floating around in your mind. Notice how your body feels when you think of this thought/story line.
Now imagine pulling the thought (a floating sentence or paragraph of physical words or an image of a thought) right out in front of you so you’re staring it in the face.
Ask yourself, “Is this thought/story really true?” Hint: the answer is no.
Now firmly say, “This isn’t real, this isn’t true!” At the same time, physically swipe the floating sentence, paragraph of words or the image of the thought away with your hand.
Next, take a deep breath through your nose into your belly, then slowly exhale out your mouth. Notice how your body feels after this. Sit with this new feeling for a moment.
I encourage you to practice this with any negative thought or story line that arises. Building and choosing new neural pathways (neuroplasticity) requires repetition. May this technique, or any nervous system regulation technique you prefer, help you move through the holidays + your life with greater resilience.
Remember: This post is for informational purposes only and may not be the best fit for you and your personal situation. It shall not be construed as medical advice. The information and education provided here is not intended or implied to supplement or replace professional medical treatment, advice, and/or diagnosis. Always check with your own physician or medical professional before trying or implementing any information read here.